[Mb-civic] Why Christian Women Give The Best Blowjobs

Cheeseburger maxfury at granderiver.net
Sun Jan 23 23:47:09 PST 2005


Re:  Why Christian Women Give The Best Blowjobs


Ian wrote:

=========
Cheese:

Need I say that this is the most unnecessarily offensive thing you have
every posted - even to those of us who do not subscribe to the "right-wing"
Christian agenda?  Indeed, it is simply mean-spirited and insulting, and
doesn't even have the benefit of being funny or thoughtfully provocative of
some sort of discussion or debate.

This is seriously a new low for you...  How sad...  Maybe you need to find
some different grass...

Peace.
===========



Uh, I dunno, Ian, I thought it was funny as hell.

I wasn't making fun of Christians, women, sex, Jesus, whatever.

I didn't think it was a crime to try to be funny with "touchy subject
matter".

If you can't make light, *somehow*, of a huge percentage of people who wound
up helping put George W. Bush back in the presidence for ANOTHER 4 years,
then who the f*ck can you make light of, Ian...?

It was simply an actual thought that was going through my mind as I sat at
my keyboard and typed it.

And I thought it was funny.

I will try not to print thoughts anymore that offend various people.

It was just a little tribute piece to dead people like Lenny Bruce and Sam
Kinison.

I will try not to think about the word "Christian" or "Woman" in the same
sentence with "Penis", "Lips" or "Late at night under the covers".

If I do not think about Christians having sex then I will not print things
about Christians having sex.

I will talk about the Gay people having sex instead.

That will make me better received by a whole lot of them.

Seriously though, sorry if you were offended,

My intention was only to point out the rudimentary contradictions between
praising God and giving a blowjob with the same lips unless sanctioned by
God himself in holy matrimony between two adults who are not gay people.

And how it takes Christian people to operate the Christian machinery that
enables the destruction of so many things at this late date including even l
ives, that it is not all just operated by some divine force.

And that if they're not praising God one hour and giving head a few hours
later, then one of the spouses is very deprived.

I don't think there's really anything offensive with talking about anyone
having sex, no matter what religion they are.

And then Lenny Bruce took over my keyboard, and the rest is also never to be
talked about in public.

As far as the "grass", I wasn't smoking any, I actually thought that was the
funniest line I wrote in the entire piece.

Other than that, sorry if you were offended, I was just trying to make a
point, put down some thoughts, and be mildly amusing, and will talk about
beating baby seals to death next time or something.

Ah well....  For at least a second there, I thought I had finally written
something almost brilliant there instead of a failure at trying to start a
debate.

I wasn't really into debating.  It was just a piece.  A small fragment of
art.  Crude, lowbrow, tasteless, an actual slice of reality peeping through
inbetween all the b*llshit of hypocrisy.

I thought Lenny or Sam could use it.  But I remember they're dead.

And now realize I am sitting here writing script for dead people.

If I ever write anything else, Ian, I'll try to be more conformist with
presentation, although I still can't figure out how to use "lips", "penis"
and "Christian" in a sentence without censoring the entire thing.

I don't really know if (some) Christian women give the best blowjobs or not,
Ian, I was simply wondering, and it turned into a political piece with a
sexual content as its centerpiece, and then I looked back on it and thought
it was funny as hell there for a second.

Again, sorry if you were offended.  No intention of defaming Christianity,
women, sex, penises, Republicans, Jesus or anything else was there.

I dunno, my friend laughed his ass off and he's a Christian with a wife.  It
doesn't make it etched in stone as intentionally offensive, it was simply a
work in progress that developed as it was typed, as it was thought, I
thought it was hilarious, at least until you broughtt up your thoughts on
it.  I knew it was "risque", "on the cutting edge", probably something
someone like Lenny Bruce, Sam Kinison, even Richard Pryor might have done,
but I thought it was relatively well written, again, at least for a second.
I'll try not to bring those words and concepts and questions together in a
written piece again.

If I had used Islam or any other religion, though, I don't think it would
have been half as funny as it didn't turn out to be.

Anyway, Ian, sorry for talking about Christian women giving blowjobs,
perhaps it was inappropriate subject matter even though W has a permanent
hard-on right about now every time he sees one.

.

Cheeseburger

- I claim the 1st, 4th, and 7th Ammendments..........    Now I see exactly
how John Lennon got in trouble...     :|

.



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