[Mb-civic] A Day in the life of Joe Republican

[Cara Robin]

Hi Michael,
Thought this interesting - you might want to pass it along.
xo Cara

 >
 >
 > A DAY IN THE LIFE OF JOE REPUBLICAN
 >
 > Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with
 > water to prepare his
 > morning coffee. The water is clean and good because
 > some tree-hugging
 > liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards.
 > With his first swallow
 > of coffee, he takes his daily medication. His
 > medications are safe to take
 > because some stupid commie liberal fought to insure
 > their safety and that
 > they work as advertised.
 > All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his
 > employer's medical plan
 > because some liberal union workers fought their
 > employers for paid medical
 > insurance -- now Joe gets it, too. He prepares his
 > morning breakfast, bacon
 > and eggs. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some
 > girly-man liberal fought
 > for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.
 > In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo.
 > His bottle is properly
 > labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the
 > total contents because
 > some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what
 > he was putting on his
 > body and how much it contained. Joe dresses, walks
 > outside and takes a deep
 > breath. The air he breathes is clean because some
 > environmentalist wacko
 > liberal fought for laws to stop industries from
 > polluting our air. He walks
 > to the subway station for his government-subsidized
 > ride to work. It saves
 > him considerable money in parking and transportation
 > fees because some
 > fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public
 > transportation, which gives
 > everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.
 > Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with
 > excellent pay, medical
 > benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation
 > because some lazy liberal
 > union members fought and died for these working
 > standards. Joes employer
 > pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't
 > want h is employees to
 > call the union. If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes
 > unemployed, he'll get a
 > worker compensation or unemployment check because some
 > stupid liberal didn't
 > think he should lose his home because of his temporary
 > misfortune.
 > Its noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so
 > he can pay some bills.
 > Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC
 > because some godless liberal
 > wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous
 > bankers who ruined the
 > banking system before the Great Depression.
 > Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage
 > and his below-market
 > federal student loan because some elitist liberal
 > decided that Joe and the
 > government would be better off if he was educated and
 > earned more money over
 > his lifetime.
 > Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father
 > this evening at his farm
 > home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive.
 > His car is among the
 > safest in the world because some America-hating
 > liberal fought for car
 > safety standards. He arrives at his boyhood home. His
 > was the third
 > generation to live in the house financed by Farmers'
 > Home Administration
 > because bankers didn't want to make rural loans. The
 > house didn't have
 > electricity until some big-government liberal stuck
 > his nose where it didn't
 > belong and demanded rural electrification.
 > He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His
 > father lives on
 > Social Security and a union pension because some
 > wine-drinking,
 > cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of
 > himself so Joe
 > wouldn't have to.
 > Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns
 > on a radio talk show.
 > The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and
 > conservatives are
 > good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans
 > have fought against
 > every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his
 > day.
 > Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government
 > liberals ruining our lives!
 > After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone
 > should take care of
 > themselves, just like I have."
 >
 >

 >
 >